The Truth About Today

Sometimes I let myself think I have it all together. I smile and give myself a little pat on the back because I think I've got it all figured out.

I once had a friend tell me that she wanted to come to "Rachel Bootcamp" because I had a clean house, good kids and it all seemed so easy. At the time I laughed about it because I so do NOT have it all figured out. I don't have a clean house and my kids can be the biggest stinkers there are, trust me. And, those times I do let myself think I've got it all together, I'm always quickly reminded that I don't. Lest anyone should ever again think I have it all together, let me recap the past 2 days.

Harrison cried at preschool dropoff yesterday. I still don't know why, but he cried so long & hard that I had to get him and take him home. Put a big wrench in the stuff I was going to get done yesterday.

Matt's supposed to come home early-ish on Tuesdays, but it was bedtime before he got home last night (and the night before, and tonight). And, when he did get home, he excitedly told me that he was going to get to go to a conference soon. In Indianapolis. For 5 days. Yay.

We've eaten dinner on paper plates for the past 3 nights. Tonight they had pizza and cookies which is oh, so, nutritious. Last night they had hotdogs (ok, actually turkeydogs). This week's healthy cooking goal: F.A.I.L.

Charlotte screams 90% of the time that I'm not holding her. Not kidding at all. Bless her heart, I love her so much and someday when I have to have hip replacement (on my left hip, her favorite) I'm sure she'll come and wait on me hand and foot. Seriously, the crying is about to make me pull my hair out...or maybe it will just fall out again. I've never NEVER had one of the other kids cry this much unless being held. WHY????? My only consolation is that I know I'm not alone in this -- thank goodness for good friends that can empathize and sympathize. :)

Last night I let Charlotte cry in her bed for a good 15 minutes while I helped Madeleine with her homework. And, Miss Charlotte let us know she was not at all happy about that by screaming for most of the 15 minutes. I'd tried to hold her while Madeleine did her homework, but she kept grabbing at the paper & pencil and being a pill in general, so off she went to her bed. It was a tough 15 minutes on all of us, but I reminded myself that it's important to Madeleine to have that attention and thanks to the big district-wide literacy push, she actually needed my help (main idea, details...I've forgotten so much!). Thankfully, we all survived.

I let Charlotte eat an entire bag of yogurt melts yesterday afternoon because she was quiet for 10 whole minutes while she did it. Then I let her unpack her diaperbag and my purse because it bought me another 5 minutes -- enough time to fold/put away some laundry.

Tonight I ate my dinner sitting on the potty (lid down) while Charlotte had her bath because she cried every time I left the room, but was happy playing in the tub while I was there. Not the highlight of my week, but sometime you do whatever it takes.

After the past 2 days, I'm thinking the week can only look up. Thankfully, days like this are few and far between, usually. But, even on the bad days I wouldn't trade being home with my kids for anything....although I could occasionally use a few hours out of the house.